Reality bites: Trust

Trusting someone. Do we really need to trust someone? Is it that important? Can you really trust someone wholeheartedly? Without any questions and doubts? Are you brave enough to take a risk and trust someone?

I’ve been betrayed many times, by my friends, special someone and even a family member.

Different aspects and levels but still.. I was betrayed.

The feeling is nothing but awful, it’s like letting them bite you in the ass.  It’s exposing yourself out in the open and letting them have a feast.

Trust makes you vulnerable but it also opens us to new possibilities and chances. If you trust too much, you will be deceived and if not you’ll just let the opportunities pass. You have to remind yourself not to open up and be too honest with people. They said that “The best proof of love is trust”, therefore you have to trust yourself in order to love yourself. I can’t really apply that on relationships though because for me Trust in relationships are a bit overrated and overused that it becomes vague and meaningless.

I think that trusting is not about the other person, it’s not about how good he/she treats you because I can assure you that.. someday, somehow they will betray you in any way without you even knowing it.

I’m not a hater neither am I a bitter person, I just lack the will to trust others anymore. I believe that it’s important to trust God first and then yourself.

Cursed is the man who trusts in man And makes flesh his strength, Whose heart departs from the Lord.” Jeremiah 17:5

Have you been sunkissed?

It’s the end of the month of May. It’s raining tonight and summer is over. Class will start soon and I think, for students it’s back to their normal boring and stressful school life.  Summer is already over and I’m a bit devastated because I  was not able to fully enjoyed it, all I’ve experienced was the intense summer heat. I did not go swimming and even go out of town. I wasted another summer.

I miss the days when summer vacation was about relaxing and hanging out with friends. Now it’s all about working and squeezing your friends in when you can.='(

What did you do this summer?

The hands of the creatively maladjusted.

Nowadays, people are so into fashion and most girls like dressing up. Everyday, especially on the internet we can see girls and also boys who show us on how to dress up showing different styles and in different ways. You can see them on Lookbook or Chictopia. They call themselves Fashionistas, Fashion trendsetter or Style seekers. Probably my favorite fashion blogger/enthusiast is Jessica Tran, she’s from Australia but she looks very asian, her style is really unique and very chic and I love how she writes her blogs.

I like dressing up too and wearing cute dresses and clothes. I really adore Korean’s style of clothing and I’m a big fan of Thrift stores. But, what I love doing most is creating or making dresses and clothes.

I learned how to sew because of my mom. She’s a famous Fashion designer, JUST KIDDING! hehe. Before she became a Public Official she’s into dressmaking and we have a Sewing machine and a lock-stitch machine. So, when I was younger, I always see her sewing but I really had no interest in dressmaking at that time. Little did I know that later on, I will be really hooked on it. I guess, as they said children often acquire the talent or skills of their parents. I think that’s what happened to me.

Right now, I’m still a beginner and I can only make sleeveless tops and garterized skirts. I also know how to alter some clothes or dresses, like what I did here. I like the feeling of seeing the finished product and it’s exciting to wear it knowing that you made it.

Here’s one of the flowy sleeveless tops that I made.

I think sleeveless are really easy to do, you just need a pattern for front and back and follow the pattern direction for putting the front and back of the garment together. Sew everything together according to the pattern.
Read more: How to Make a Shirt Sleeveless 

Here’s the garterized skirt that I made.

It’s hard making this because you have to measure the garter and you have to make sure that it will fit the length of the garment that you already cut out.

I know I still need more practice and effort before I can make real dresses and clothes. But, atleast I already know the basics. That proud feeling that you get whenever you see and wear your creations are already worth it.

“We are all artists in everything we do. Art is creating; it is our link that makes us like god. All you have to do is look at any form of nature to know that god was the greatest artist of all. He gives us beauty in his creations to inspire us to find the artists inside of us. Art isn’t just about painting or sculpture. It is in everything from how you organize your life to how communicate with the world.”

–Bethany Jane Andrews Hoey

Uttered or unexpressed

Is it just me or is prayer sometimes a little weird?  I mean I believe we should pray and I like to pray but there are times when I am just stuck and can’t find the words to say to HIM. I mean what can I say to the Creator of everything that He already doesn’t know?  I don’t know maybe it’s just me but sometimes praying is really difficult for me. 

When we pray to God we must be seeking nothing – nothing.  ~Saint Francis of Assisi

Video

Fun.

Fun.- All the pretty girls

This beat, the lyrics, the band and the video are all loaded with tons of cuteness! I can’t help but to post this.

Oh c’mon, what’s a boy to do,
when all the pretty girls can’t measure to you.

Here’s another one from Fun., this song has  been used in several other media or TV series. Glee made a version of this song.

We Are Young” and featuring Janelle Monáe

And their version of Carly Rae Jepsen’s Call me maybe.

They also has a version of Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye  feat. Hayley Williams. It was amazing as well.

I’ve been listening to their songs all day!

You can know more about them on their site. www.ournameisfun.com

Shake it out

Since I was feeling a little rejected today. I was trying to distract myself with other things by listening to music, and then suddenly this song came up on my playlist. (I like Katharine’s Version).

Anyway, this song is amazing. Clearly about your failures and bad memories affecting you today. Stop dragging them around and shake them out! It was kind of like, ‘Shake yourself out of it, things will be okay’.

It’s hard to dance with a devil on your back
So, shake him off!

So, I realized that it’s a way of life and if I let it go on too long, it will only get worse. It will fester and multiply. Who wants that anyway? I know that I did my best and that’s really what matters most. It’s not really a big deal but I got really disappointed. Oh well, I can always try again.

“My fault, my failure, is not in the passions I have, but in my lack of control of them.”
— Jack Kerouac

Not what I am in search of

Today was supposed to be a job hunting day, but instead it turned out to be a fringe cropped top and a small satchel bag hunting day!

It was out of the plan but since Kae wanted to buy a skirt I accompanied her, however, I was the one who bought many things. Ugh.

I’ve been looking for a top like this since last week but I failed.

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I realized, why look for something like this when I can make my own. It’s very easy to do. So, I just bought a white sleeveless top for 50 Pesos. And I took a risk! hehe

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Of course, I can’t really cut the lower part unto the belly portion because I don’t have a flat stomach. haha!

Here’s the end result.

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And now, I’m thinking of when I can use this. hmm.

As I said, I was also looking for a small satchel bag since my small bag can’t really handle all the things that I bring whenever I go out. I have a big bag, given by my boyfriend but I use that for heavier things and whenever I go to work.

So while looking..

I was thinking of these bags.

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But, I found this!

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For only, 120 Pesos, I got my self a really cute satchel bag. =)

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What’s in my bag?

What's on my bag?

I’m one of those disorganized person that you will ever know. I’m lazy when it comes to cleaning or arranging my things especially inside my bag. I just put everything inside and I’m off.

Today, I did some cleaning and here are the things that you would usually see inside my bag, I think that this will also give you an idea of me as a person.haha!

First is the Umbrella, I hate bringing an umbrella or even using one. But, I have no choice because it’s rainy season already so I have to bring this all the time.
As you can see, I also bring tissue, yes a bathroom tissue. I don’t know if it’s bad to use on the face but I do. I don’t bring a handkerchief with me because I always lose them. So, I just settled with tissue, but the problem now is I tend to use too much of it and sometimes I throw the used ones inside the bag. Gross?haha!

The small bottle with green cap, it’s my cologne. I don’t use perfumes because the smell is too strong, I like to smell as natural as possible. It’s has double purpose for me, I sometimes use it as an alternate for ethyl alcohol.

The red one is my ponytail, I bought it just recently because I lost my last one. I chose red color because I bought it during my birthday.

I have natural curls and now that my hair are growing, more natural curls are coming out and they are very hard to manage, so for those who also has curly or wavy hair like mine, I would totally recommend for you to bring a Hair polish, mine’s Vitress.

Here in the Philippines there are so many mobile companies. But, I’m not really particular with phones (I’m not a techie person), as long as I can call and text or even use wifi, I’m already fine with it. I have two sim cards so I needed to use two cellphones. The yellow one is Dual sim however, it’s mouthpiece is broken now so I have to use my other phone. I’m still thinking of buying a new one.

My house key! My house key is with a Mahjong keychain, my brother made that using a real Mahjong piece. I need to bring it all the time because most of the time there are no people here in our house so no one would open the door for me.

Usb, I don’t usually bring this one but today, I did because I needed to save some files from the office.

My Philips MP3 with A4tech earphones, he’s name is choco, my boyfriend gave it to me, I think almost 2 years ago. I’m not sure but I remember it was his Christmas gift for me. That time, I was planning to buy an Ipod, because I got my ipod shuffle broken back when I was still in the University, since then I’ve been using my phone to listen to music. So, since I was bragging about how I wanted to have an MP3, he suprisingly bought me one. It’s very durable maybe because of it’s size and weight.

Nichido matte lipstick and concealer. I’ve been using Nichido matte lisptick for 5 months now, I used to have just a lip tint because I always look really pale, but they always fade off really fast so I changed into a lipstick.

Maybelline Natural face powder, I love this face powder because it’s not sticky on the face unlike my past face powder. And lastly, Vicks! Hehehe! I just recently bought this because I always feel a little dizzy, especially when I ride buses and taxis, I’m not liking the smell of their aircon so I need to bring this.

So there, just a few things that keeps me going everyday.  Hey! what’s in your bag?

Smart Women, Foolish choices

Fortunately, I saw this just days ago while we were cleaning and taking out all the old books, clothes and things of my sister in her room.

I noticed that she really has plenty of books and all of them were almost worn out.

I just picked out some books that I think may be able to survive another reading. hehe.

Smart Women, Foolish Choices: Finding the right men. Avoiding the wrong ones, was published in 1986.

This book is just in time and what I needed for the moment. So far, I’m liking this book. I think this is the first non-novel/story kind of book that I have read.  Fun to read after a break up.

“It is written by two male clinical psychologists Dr. Connell Cowan and Dr. Melvyn Kinder. This book will get you to look at your self-defeating behaviors so you might gain some insight into your “love-defeating” attitudes and stereotypes. These authors tell us why smart women are drawn to the wrong men, and they will tell you how to have realistic expectations for our relationships.”

What I like about this book is that the writers are men and they gave advices for females on what they should do and how to understand men. Unusual huh? In this book, they gave many examples and different situations. For example, this book tells you about 4 basic bad guys to avoid, also how to move on and when to let go.  The book consists of two parts, the first one is about being Foolish, it’s about the wrong choices and decisions women make and how it leads to failure and the second part is about Getting smart, this is where they give advices on the things that you must do and to understand how to manage those foolish choices especially with men and how to find a “Diamond in the rough”.  I particularly love the part where they showed the differences between Longing and Loving — how longing is often misunderstood as Love.

I would totally recommend this especially to those girls who are having a hard time with their personal and relationship status. This will give you a very realistic view on relationships and social ideas.

“But it’s crucial for a woman to realize that she was not simply a respondent in the relationship, but half of the reason for the chemistry. Without her, the magic would not have existed.”

The pleasure of appreciation

It’s one of those days where you just feel appreciated.

As I said in my entry about Why do I blog?, I don’t usually tell my friends that I blog things about my life and ideas. I did not make this to boast but to enjoy my interest in writing. Eversince I was young, this has always been one of my favorite things to do.. Writing. Most of my friends know this. For me, having a blog like this has always been my favorite past time. I do it for fun and sometimes this helps me to loosen up the negative energies that I feel whenever i´m stressed and feeling off the scene. I especially feel psyched whenever people can relate to me. I think that, it would be really amazing to look back 10 years or more from now and see the changes and decisions that i´ve made in my life through this online blog. I bet it would be comical and so amusing!!

This morning, when my friend Acza, told me that she saw my site and read my posts. It was really overwhelming to know that those persons who are close to you noticed and appreciated your work. As the great Voltaire said, “Appreciation is a wonderful thing, it makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well”. She has always been an achiever and sheś really smart, so it really made my day,hearing about her thoughts about me.