Thoughts during midnight

The truth is im scared.
Im scared of the future, im scared of the now.

Im planning things, i have my goals painted on my walls but im afraid to take the first step. Im afraid of risks.

Im scared of the uncertain. Im scared of my doubts. Im definitely not immaculate in all aspects but neither those people around me, around them.

I wish i was strong. I wish i looked exactly how i feel. Carefree and high spirited.
Buoyant and radiant.

But this is me, I am in my now.
I just want to be satisfied.
I just want to be proud.