December: Things I am letting go off.

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This is about the Instagram post I saw from self-care spotlight. Just jotting down some of my current thoughts and what I want to fully let go off hopefully this year (but still giving myself a few more months. Ha-ha!)

I know 2020 has been a year of realization for most of us. We realized how short life is, to live in the present but still always look at the future with uncertainty and that we need to be ready all the time may it be financially, mentally and physically.

For me aside from these, one of my realizations is that there are a lot of things that I need to slowly let go off before we officially let go of 2020 as well..

The need for control: Its hard. It is honestly hard because I was born to be always in control. I think I got this from my mom (who is born a leader and a people person) But having kids and living with someone totally different from you can be quite hard to be in full charge. But I learned that sometimes you must compromise, and you must think that it is not for you. It is for them and I must listen and give them opportunity to decide and grow on their own.

My comfort Zone: Another difficult thing it to do not just for me (well I think for everyone too) is letting go of your comfort zone and getting out of your box. I have been thinking really hard of what are the ways that I can somehow escape my bubble and I realized that there are many simple things in which you can go out of your way from your comfort zone, like a simple communication with your neighbors (take note I don’t even talk to neighbors hehe) can be helpful in knowing and finding something new that can be useful someday.

Overscheduling life: I realized that I should take things slow and that I need to focus and stop putting too much energy into something at once. It is important to have a to do list or your plan of the day. One of the things that I learned from raising a son is that I must schedule our day this helps me to do what is expected and never feeling like I never did enough.

Unhealthy relationships: Social media, this what I first thought about unhealthy relationships. I have this really unhealthy way of using the social media before, on Facebook I used to post and say too much but I realized that not all people on Facebook should know everything. So its okay to let go (well maybe not totally letting go but decreasing usage is one thing that I can do)

Fear and guilt: As a mother we all feel a lot of fear and guilt and sometimes I even cry my self to sleep just thinking about it. I have learned that I need to sometimes let my self take it all in but at the end of the day find some rationale on what happened and why I feel that fear and guilt. It is good to acknowledge it first and then move on and find any solution (for any fear) and let go of the guilt.

Comparing myself to Other and insecurities: Another difficult thing to do especially when you are a Taurus. Just kidding! (its actually scorpio haha!) Anyway, what I liked about my partner is that he never compares himself to others (well maybe in terms of physique lol) but in status, career etc. He is never liked that. He scrolls facebook all day but he never felt that and I adore this attitude of him so much that I wish I can also do this. We always say to never compare and be insecured but it is easier said than done and I am sure it will be a forever battle as long as you are never content with what you have.

Clutter: When we moved here in our simple abode (a 2-bedroom unit) everything went by so fast. We had to renovate it as soon as possible that we didn’t have time to really think of the design and what we wanted to do or have in the house. We are in such a hurry that when we finally moved, life was so fast next thing we know we have so much stuff in the house that we never really needed, we have no organization, everything is cramped up and all over the place. We realized that we needed to let go and one thing that I requested to my partner (when he started wood working during this pandemic) is to make more cabinets and storage areas. I am also slowly donating and letting go a lot of my things and clothes (yey to more handmade things 😊 )

What are you letting go off this year?

Our Financial Goals and Management

One of the things that we realized during this Pandemic is how important it is to have an emergency fund and savings.

I mean this pandemic is no joke, I have read news of company layoffs and I know some people who lost their Jobs and had to find a new way to earn in the midst of this global pandemic. It’s hard most especially for those without any savings or emergency funds, and thankfully we are lucky enough to be able to still work and pay for our monthly bills.

Growing up, my parents are mostly self-employed. Although they are earning well, they really did not prepare for their retirement. No SSS, No Pag ibig Fund and other types of Savings and Investments. They are not knowledgeable in terms of Financial planning and having Financial Goals. Hence, No one taught me how to save, what to do and what financial management is. I have to learn everything on my own.

Looking back, I wish I had learned sooner, but one thing I know is that you really have to surround yourself with People who will introduce you to these information and learn from them. When I started working, what I only knew is that I need to put my money in the bank and that’s it. I changed my career and earned a little more but my ways are still the same and I also increased my expenses, I acquired my first Credit Card and next thing I know I was in debt.

I think, it all started when one of my workmates introduced me to Life and VUL insurance. I felt ecstatic during that time, that  finally I have something to start with and that I am starting to prepare for my future. Then, I met some of my Highschool friends (mostly are accountants) and they talked about Stocks, I was a bit out of the conversation because it is the first time that I am hearing those information. When I got home, I started searching about it but forgot about it after a few days (I found the process of opening an account a bit of a hassle). Then I found this book “A women’s guide to successful investing” during one of my bookstore run. There I learned about Assets, Liabilities and your Net worth. Funny enough, I used the formula and I learned that  I AM BROKE. LOL

But Good thing about it is that I started to find ways to earn, to invest and to be smart enough to where I should put my money. Increasing your assets is always a good option but I am not the kind of person who likes to sell things (It may seem otherwise but really, I get easily stressed during shipping and other conversations that I have to make just to sell items)

So, I think, investing and having my money earn while I do nothing is the next option for me. LOL.

 I started my Easy Investment plans in one of my bank accounts (high yields), Opened my Stocks account (although I am not as active here but I think as a long term investment this can help), added another Insurance and one of my workmates introduced me to MP2 (see? I told you, it is important to surround yourself with people who will teach you these kinds of things). Not much yet since I am just starting but I think, having to have your first step and having these financial goals is really important. It’s always good to start somewhere and be consistent with it.

When my partner and I started living together, I was really devastated that he does not have any savings at all. He does not know how to invest, manage his own finance, no financial goals (talk about men being immature lol) but yes, it took me 3 years of persuasion for him to realize that he needs to do this, he needs to have a goal and he needs to invest and save. And look at him now, wah I am so proud. And more than ever, under this Pandemic, he realized that it is really a good thing that he finally started saving and slowly building up his emergency fund.

Right now, we are still finding other investments (Maybe real estate and retirement plans) that we can build to be prepared and be financially free someday.

What’s you Financial Goals? Any investment options that you can share?

Our “New Normal”

Oh wow its August. Just like that and we are now on our 5th month working from home. Funny how I used to wish for me to have a job where I can work from home and take care of Mason. And look! I am now working from home!! Honestly not the best time for this to happen but this is the new norm now ( I somehow miss our office)

Our new Normal consists of waking up, cooking lunch, watching tv, playing with Mason, Mason’s naptime while I work ( all of these while Bryan is sleeping) late in the afternoon, I’ll have to wake them up and it’s his time to look after Mason while I work. This routine is our weekday schedule but weekend schedule is almost the same except that I dont have any work and I get to sew when Mason is asleep. Everything is repetitive now that I dont really look forward to anything anymore.

There’s too much that is going on outside but we can’t really do anything because of pandemic quarantine guidelines. Everyday that I open my social media accounts, I get devastated with news and this new norm just adds up the tension that I feel. I am sure its just not me who’s getting mentally challenged by this new norm.

Well, I guess I just miss the Old normal when we get excited to go out every weekend, when we can still wear our favorite clothes and socialize with friends and family, when we can eat outside and enjoy the view, when we can still stay out late and not wear any masks or face shields.

Not sure when we’ll have answers to this pandemic but we just have to stick to our new normal now and just hope that at the end of this pandemic we’ll come out stronger both mentally and physically and we’ll never take anything for granted again. 😩

On lockdown

What have you been up to lately?

We are currently on extended community quarantine. Cases have been going up and i dont know until when we’ll be like this. But what I do know is we need to be safe and this is the only way that helps.

There are a lot of things that I am feeling down about for the past few days and in the coming days as we extend this quarantine.

Vacation plans cancelled

Birthday (not cancelled 😂) but celebrations with family will be.

I miss my mom

I miss eating out

I miss shopping

And i just miss everything we used to do. But these are just petty things but still valid feelings.

However, amidst all these cancelled things and plans. I am most thankful for my healthy family. For our jobs that we get to work from home, for our daily food and for all the friends who checks for us from time to time.

Its okay to feel sad, mad or even scared and anxious but dont forget to be grateful and think of the good things that you have while we experience this pandemic.

Aside from being thankful, Ive been distracting my self with a lot of cooking, baking and sometimes sewing DIYs. Maybe I’ll post some here.

How about you? How do you cope with the stress during this pandemic and quarantine?