Quick post: The ‘ber’ months

Yep its here. We are here. Hello to the first day of September. Did you feel any difference at all? 😂

Who would have thought that we’ll be welcoming the much awaited ‘ber’ months while on quarantine? During this time of the year, I would usually scroll and look at my calendar trying to fit every reunion, out of town celebrations, parties and events with what’s left on my vacation leaves. But this year, my leaves are just sitting, waiting to be used and would probably be carried on for next year.

There are really things that we cannot control like this (this whole pandemic actually). And as someone with anxiety, cancelled plans makes me really stressed. So with the coming ‘ber’ months, I decided to make and create some of the things I am looking forward to. Atleast this gives me something to be excited about, something to motivate me and have something I can control.

Also, writing all these stuff up so that i’ll remember what I did during the pandemic 😅

Life… is not …

Life… is not simply a series of exciting new ventures. The future is not always a whole new ball game. There tends to be unfinished business. One trails all sorts of things around with one, things that simply won’t be got rid of. —Anita Brookner

For the past 3 years, since I graduated from the University and took the Nursing Licensure Exam. I realized only one thing. My plans are continuously changing. While browsing my old blog account, I remembered my past plans and the things that I wanted to do.

I remembered the time when I was planning of taking up masterals. It was my original plan but then I got really fond with my work especially by the time that I was earning my salary. It was not that big but it was a big deal for me. I also had plans of having my own online business or store, especially about clothes and accessories. We bought equipments and studied sewing but we were not able to pursue it. I still have plans on having my own business but maybe not this year.

Months ago, I had plans of going abroad, but I realized that it’s not easy to do it. They said, when you work abroad, it’s a battle between loneliness and depression. I know that it’s hard but I’m willing to take a risk. I still have plans to go abroad and if I had a chance, I would definitely grab it. It’s not all about the money but also a chance to showcase my skills and to challenge my abilities especially when you’re far from your loved ones. I’ve never been independent, I don’t know how to cook and I’m still not good in doing household chores like washing clothes and Ironing them (although, we don’t usually do that anymore.) I think, working abroad will really enhance my skills and who knows, I might even be surprised of the things that I can do.

For now, I just need to focus on finding my next job, I’m really nervous and sometimes, I feel like I’m uncertain on what I feel about what kind of job do I really want. I want to work and explore my options but my parents, my ego and some people are holding me back to Nursing. I can’t help but feel pressured.

Tell me more about

I really have a short temper and patience. I get really stubborn at times too. I always wanted things to go my way and if it will not, I will surely be disappointed.

When people ask you of what they wanted you to do, and you try your best to make it happen but at the end of the day, they are the ones who will be backing out and make other plans. Ahh.. that’s what really pisses me off. You shouldn’t have asked in the first place. I just wasted my time, effort and sometimes money. That really sucks!

I’m not really good in making plans but when I want it I really try to do it even without anyone’s help. I can get really frustrated at times, so it doubles my frustrations and disappointments whenever it doesn’t work out. Oh life!